WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?

 

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?

 

When we turn our backs we only see what is in front of us.

 

Bear with me and hold on to your instinctive reaction, grudges and biases until you finish reading the entire article because it deals with a subject that is not without sensitivity and controversy.  Transgender athletes will be banned from the 2028 Olympics.  Some of you may rightfully feel that we seem to spend an inordinate amount of time and media publicity on a relatively small percentage of the population.  In part it has to do with an unhealthy fascination with anything out of the ordinary in our dreary lives and especially when it involves individuals with a high public profile.  Tabloid fodder.

Gender reassignment is a transformative choice that comes with consequences.  Those involved can’t expect or demand that changing gender is like flicking a light switch and that a magical physical and psychological readjustment takes place that brings about true and transformative change.  Man to woman, woman to man.  Not a big issue if it doesn’t involve competition or a traditional role unique to a particular sex.  It would be absolutely wonderful if people struggling with a sexual identity could be like butterflies and emerge almost cocoon-like into what they desire to be.

Out in the open.

It is a blessing that an individual’s sexuality is no longer restricted to a closet existence or punishable by law, but we also need to take in account that an extreme amount of attention—pro and con—can have a confusing impact on an individual struggling to find their place in the world.  Can a struggle with a sexual preference or identity be influenced by society and how it deals with the issue on a huge variety of media platforms?  I would like to draw a parallel to the obsession with tattoos and people slavishly imitating and responding to treating their skin as if it is a coloring book with the most outlandish reasons and excuses.  From drawing attention to themselves (hey, look at me!) to searching for an identity, an identity expressed by selecting symbols, texts and images from a tattoo inventory!  I don’t know who I really am, but perhaps the tattoos will act like a map to point me in the direction of personal happiness and purpose.

Look before you leap.

Transgender surgeries are not totally irreversible, but not unlike tattoos, removal or reversal, doesn’t come without scars, blemishes or psychological damage.  And for those individuals contemplating surgery to find the happiness they are after, transgender transformation is not only radical, but it doesn’t diminish the emotional and physical baggage they are leaving behind.  We all are impressionable creatures and media platforms capitalize on all our foibles, transgressions and desires.  Gullible and easily taken in, especially when we’re constantly ambushed by clever algorithms that zoom in on all our predilections.  We’re all encouraged to live life to the fullest and to seize the moment, the pursuit of happiness and all that jazz.  When you’re unhappy with who and what you are, transforming that unhappiness with transgender transformation is rather radical.  Society in general has a lot to answer for when it comes to expectations with stereotypical male-female obligations and to live up to hype of matrimony and having children; home, white picket fence, a pet or two, both working and the list of expectations is never ending.  We’ve become experts at putting intense pressure on ourselves and there is so much emphasis put, not only on individuality, but uniquely expressing ourselves in a world where governments and institutions demand conformity to run efficiently.  A dichotomy so profound that it comes to no surprise that so many people are struggling.

So much confusion.

All is not well.  We’re living in a topsy-turvy world and it so easy to be made to feel like an insignificant piece of flotsam drifting aimlessly on the river of life.  Take a look at the mindboggling use and abuse of illegal drugs, some of them so lethal that it leaves behind a staggering loss of life and most of them are ingested, inhaled and injected by bright, intelligent people, who somehow don’t seem to care that they’re playing Russian roulette with their lives.

It makes you wonder if a lot of it is a cry for help.  People who are demoralized and defeated by life and society’s expectations.  An escape from standards and the moralizing nature of tribes and nations.  So many people feel stuck in a rut, facing daily and lengthy commutes in snarled traffic jams, dead-end jobs and repetitive boredom.  Addicted to handheld devices that dish up a steady stream of images and so-called influencers catering to all our whims and fantasies. An illusory world that only a few of us inhabit, yet hyped by unscrupulous media platforms to make us feel connected and that we somehow belong.  Increasingly we’re creating a world where real person-to-person relationships are not only missing, but lacking in depth and sincerity.

We have deliberately turned daily routines into a dreaded drudgery rather than a necessity.  Daily survival is a matter of basic routine, a reality, and the emphasis should be on being content with who and what you are.  Life is not an unending journey of jumping from one exciting event into another.  A near orgasmic-like expectation.  Whether we like it or not, all jobs come with a kind of boring routine and a sense of sameness.  It’s our mindset that matters and how we cope with life’s often unexpected and painful detours and hiccups.  Too often we’re looking for things that don’t exist or are hopelessly out of reach, even inconsequential, because upon closer examination, they don’t really matter.

In a perfect world all of us would enjoy who and what we are without facing or sitting in constant judgement.  But we’re living in an imperfect world and imperfection is the norm and not the exception.

What are you looking for?

I eagerly await your comments and feel free to share.

Purchase my novel, Energy & Origin from KDP Amazon.ca

For something lighter: Mathew, Broderick, Fred, Roger and be entertained by my rather irreverent sense of humor.